Updated: Aug 15, 2019
Writing a blog is like soul therapy if you let it. For me it unveils more and more aspects of me that were less illuminated. Writing leaves a trail from the subconscious mind for the conscious mind to follow.
One thing that I noticed about my writing was that even though my heart was in it, (and I would always write when inspired) I realized that I was still holding back so much of myself, AND since I was only writing when I was inspired, I wasn’t being truly transparent because I was only presenting parts of my joy or enlightenment and not the whole story.
I think a huge piece of why that is, was because I had been programmed by a certain eternal tape that said “ if you show any other fluctuations other than something sparkly or good, then people will think you are messing up and that they are better than you because they identified your changes, and that I would look messy or unkempt for a "spiritual guide, lightworker thingy"......
What will people think!?!
When I realized I was not just listening to it, but believing this silliness, I actually laughed! Then I shifted my perspective completely. I know I say that pretty casually, but I have been shoved into the fires of life to know and spot an unconscious belief, and then discard it that quickly, while understanding the inverse of it as a lesson I needed to learn.
Who cares if people judge how I change and flow, this is my river of life and I’m going to enjoy the whole beautiful messy ride in all it’s perfection!!!
Even now, writing these words I feel my core tighten. My resistance to being completely vulnerable creates a clench in my middle.
Inhale,and exhale……. Stay open, stay centered.
Give, receive ...inhale, exhale. Be open………..
Back to center.......... <3
In light of this discovery, I have decided to publish a sort of raw journal as my blog, as a practice of cultivating inner strength and connection with whoever wants to follow along. I realize this means a bit of a change in content, but not as much as you would think. There is going to be a lot more personal stuff from me of course, if you read the blogs to come you will definitely get to know me well.
What am I feeling today you might wonder?
Hunger for more of what life has to offer,
Peaceful about my choices,
Love for everyone,
Thankful for avocados,
Tired from working so hard on something that can't be seen,
Excited for everything!
And very very thankful for cold water, comfy clothes and amazing music at my fingertips, and the ability to write this blog <3
This will be a window of my thoughts, my energy and how my life flows. Sometimes it's the most amazing, beautiful and mysterious adventure, and other times it is a labyrinth of fear, anxiety and shadow. But the thing, there is so much more in between,so much light, moments of peace, beauty, clarity, quiet, storms of emotions and higher wisdom flowing through me from the ether around us.
Hopefully this shift of the open heart in me, will be felt by all of you <3
I hope you enjoyed it and connected with it <3
Your Loving Dolinka (Katie Lee)